Paul Nervy Notes
“Jokes, poems, stories, and a lot of philosophy, psychology, and sociology.”


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Psychology, emotion, specific, esteem dignity.  ---  .This section is about esteem and dignity.  Topics include: ( ) Dignity.  ( ) Self esteem.  ( ) Respect.  ---  1/24/2006


Psychology, emotion, specific, esteem dignity.  ---  (1) Feeling justifiably proud of yourself and feeling good about yourself.  Vs. (2) Feeling justifiably bad about yourself.  Feeling like shit.  Feeling you didn't follow your soul.  Feeling like you caved in, and wimped out.  (3) What makes me feel like 1 and 2?  How to get from 2 to 1?  ---  08/02/1993


Psychology, emotion, specific, esteem dignity.  ---  (1) Feeling of self worth.  I have worth.  I have value.  I am valuable.  Self worth is knowing your potential, and your growth ability.  (2) This is different from self confidence, "I can do it, I can make it."  (3) Self esteem is "I like me, I am o.k., I care about me."  (4) Self respect "I respect me".  ---  12/30/1995


Psychology, emotion, specific, esteem dignity.  ---  (1) Over inflated sense of self esteem.  Thinking you (and your group) are better than you are.  Thinking you are better than others when you are not.  (2) Under inflated sense of self esteem.  Thinking you (and your group) (and your accomplishments) are worse than you (and they) are.  Thinking you are worse than others when you are not.  ---  09/15/1993


Psychology, emotion, specific, esteem dignity.  ---  (1) Self Respect.  (2) Social respect (from and towards others).  See also self esteem, self confidence, dignity, and duty to self.  ---  12/30/1992


Psychology, emotion, specific, esteem dignity.  ---  (1) Some people's self-worth (i.e., how valuable they feel they are) is based on their social worth (i.e., how valuable society thinks that person is).  (2) Other people's sense of self-worth comes from how the person feels about their own self, regardless of what society thinks of them.  ---  6/23/2000


Psychology, emotion, specific, esteem dignity.  ---  (1) The opposite of good self-esteem is feeling worthless or bad/evil.  (2) We should we respect ourselves as much as we respect all others.  Respect everyone the same.  And how much should that be?  (A) Enough not to hurt feelings.  (B) Enough to recognize the potential ability (not actual ability) to do good in all of us.  (C) Respect all humans deserve just by being human.  ---  9/29/1998


Psychology, emotion, specific, esteem dignity.  ---  Dignity: is toward self.  Respect: is toward others.  ---  4/28/2001


Psychology, emotion, specific, esteem dignity.  ---  Dignity: value of human life.  ---  12/30/1992


Psychology, emotion, specific, esteem dignity.  ---  Dignity.  (1) Recognition of actual and potential value of a thing (especially, yourself or other person).  (2) Corresponding respect in action for a thing.  ---  12/30/1992


Psychology, emotion, specific, esteem dignity.  ---  Dignity.  Sense of worth of human life.  Your worth, and others worth.  What it's worth is, and what it could become.  Ideal good and ideal bad.  ---  12/30/1992


Psychology, emotion, specific, esteem dignity.  ---  Duty to self: (1) Keep growing.  (2) Get and stay healthy (psychological, physical, financial).  (3) Experience everything.  (4) Learn everything (intellectual knowledge, and emotional knowledge).  (5) Record everything.  ---  12/30/1992


Psychology, emotion, specific, esteem dignity.  ---  How much respect we feel we deserve.  Some expect too much.  Some expect too little.  ---  9/29/1998


Psychology, emotion, specific, esteem dignity.  ---  How to keep your self respect and hope in the face of being a loser?  ---  12/30/1992


Psychology, emotion, specific, esteem dignity.  ---  Know who you are and know what you could be.  No more and no less.  It is impossible to know for sure?  ---  12/30/1992


Psychology, emotion, specific, esteem dignity.  ---  Low self esteem thoughts: unhealthy.  High self esteem: healthy.  Too high self esteem: deluded?  ---  12/30/1992


Psychology, emotion, specific, esteem dignity.  ---  Making the most of your potential, psychological and physical.  What it takes to do so.  ---  12/30/1992


Psychology, emotion, specific, esteem dignity.  ---  People need to make themselves feel special and needed, even when they are not, in order to maintain their self esteem, which is necessary for survival.  ---  10/20/1997


Psychology, emotion, specific, esteem dignity.  ---  Relationship between self-respect and social-respect.  If someone has a weak sense of self-respect they may demand much social-respect.  If someone has a strong sense of self-respect they may not require that other people show excessive social-respect to them.  (See also: Psychology, emotion, specific, esteem.  See also: Sociology, discrimination, bullying.).  ---  9/17/2001


Psychology, emotion, specific, esteem dignity.  ---  Respect is not just an emotion.  Respect is a thought calculation about how much respect you think others owe you and how much you owe others.  Then a feeling when you get it or not, or when you give it or not.  ---  4/20/2001


Psychology, emotion, specific, esteem dignity.  ---  Respect yourself as someone who is not perfect but trying.  Not trying perfectly, nor trying to be perfect, but trying nevertheless for truth and justice.  ---  12/30/1992


Psychology, emotion, specific, esteem dignity.  ---  Respect: shown vs. respect said vs. respect thought and felt.  Based on (1) Philosophy and religion belief about rights and duty for all men.  (2) Your image projected.  (3) Your reputation, true or false, good or bad.  (4) Your words or actions.  (5) What they think you have or could do.  ---  12/30/1992


Psychology, emotion, specific, esteem dignity.  ---  Respect: you for them, and them for you vs. mere liking and disliking.  ---  12/30/1992


Psychology, emotion, specific, esteem dignity.  ---  Respect.  How much needed, why needed.  How get: mystery, lay low.  Getting it for free vs. earning it.  What do most people respect and admire?  Power, age, knowledge, beauty.  I respect only ideas.  ---  12/30/1992


Psychology, emotion, specific, esteem dignity.  ---  Respect.  Is respect social psychology or power?  Respect from others (as opposed to self respect).  Respect you feel you are getting vs. respect they feel they are giving you.  Respect gained from others who feel for you admiration, fear, or awareness as an equal.  ---  12/30/1992


Psychology, emotion, specific, esteem dignity.  ---  Respect.  Is there anything that makes you lose respect more than someone who says, "More than the others you must respect me."  ---  9/22/2003


Psychology, emotion, specific, esteem dignity.  ---  Respect.  That is to say, is there anything that makes you lose respect more than someone who says, "You must respect me more than you respect the others."  ---  11/16/2004


Psychology, emotion, specific, esteem dignity.  ---  Respect.  Those who want more respect want more power.  ---  6/5/2004


Psychology, emotion, specific, esteem dignity.  ---  Self emotions and social emotions.  (1)(A) Loss of self respect.  (B) Loss of social respect in the eyes of others.  (2)(A) Loss of self worth.  (B) Loss of social worth in the eyes of others.  (3) Definitions.  Self worth is to feel yourself useful and valuable.  Social worth is for other people to see you as useful and valued.  ---  5/25/2000


Psychology, emotion, specific, esteem dignity.  ---  Self esteem and social esteem, to what degree are they tied together?  How does gain or loss of one affect gain or loss of the other?  If I'm trying to build self esteem, how do I do so in the face of hard knocks and failures?  ---  6/12/2003


Psychology, emotion, specific, esteem dignity.  ---  Self esteem.  One technique for boosting someone's self-esteem, in order to make them feel better, in order to make them more productive, and so they do not kill themselves, is to make people feel needed.  Say, "I need you.  You are important.".  ---  12/29/1997


Psychology, emotion, specific, esteem dignity.  ---  Self esteem.  What is the right amount of self esteem to have?  I say, more than is objectively justified.  In this way self esteem is much like optimism in that human mental health does not thrive on realism but rather hope.  ---  5/6/1999


Psychology, emotion, specific, esteem dignity.  ---  Social respect.  What is social respect?  What behaviors signify giving respect to other people?  What behaviors signify a desire for respect from others?  What behaviors actually deserve respect from others?  How is social respect related to admiration and fear?  (2) Desire to be valued for what you are vs. desire to be better than the next person.  (3) Desire not to be messed with vs. desire to mess with others.  (4) Is social respect really simply a social power issue related to pecking orders?  (5) Some people need to feel superior.  Other people are more egalitarian.  (6) Some people need everyone to be like them.  Other people tolerate diversity.  ---  9/19/2001


Psychology, emotion, specific, esteem dignity.  ---  The Groucho Marx joke "I would not want to belong to a club that would have me as a member.", is a quote used by people with low self worth.  ---  8/15/1999


Psychology, emotion, specific, esteem dignity.  ---  Thinking you are more or less than you are.  More: conceit, egotism.  Less: modesty, humility.  Neutral: self confidence.  ---  12/30/1992


Psychology, emotion, specific, esteem dignity.  ---  Why are some people obsessed with receiving inordinate amounts of respect from other people?  For example, why are bullies obsessed with receiving inordinate amounts of respect?  (1) Because they want to maintain an appearance of respectability.  They want a front of respectability to cover up their disreputable actions.  The sleaziest people often demand to be respected above and beyond others.  (2) People who are obsessed with receiving extra signs of respect are often also obsessed with power.  ---  10/15/2004


Psychology, emotion, specific, esteem dignity.  ---  Worth.  (1) Respecting (acknowledging) the worth of others.  (2) Respecting self worth.  (3) Everyone has the same worth.  That worth never varies.  That worth is very high.  ---  6/23/2000


Psychology, emotion, specific, esteem dignity.  ---  You don't deserve bad things.  Self esteem has two components (1) Objective, social esteem: I measure up to others (ex. I was at top of my medical school class so I deserve to be a doctor).  (2) Subjective, personal esteem: I gave 100%, my best effort (ex. I spent long hours studying to be a doctor, I really earned it).  ---  12/30/1995




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Paul Nervy Notes. Copyright 1988-2007 by Paul Nervy.